Pursuing Bo Derek

As a typical college guy, it was not unusual for me and my buddies to go on the hunt on a Friday or Saturday night. Hunting what? Young college co-eds. Young women.

Our Serengeti Plain was either the bars in our college town or we would hit the road to a nearby community, that was the home of a woman’s teacher’s college. Maverick, in the Movie, “Top Gun,” would suggest that these were “Target Rich” environments.

Regardless of my wingmen, I had my own strategy. We were mostly pigs at the age of 19 or so. Often women were rated on a scale of 1-10. However, our standards varied if it were 7 PM on a Friday night or approaching midnight. We were much more accepting as the hour grew late. Hell, any date was better than no date.

Remember we are young men, who often acted like pigs.

If we encountered a group of young ladies, there always was the leader, a 10.0, in our rating system. Her sidekicks varied. My strategy was to never go after the leader. Why? Because all of my buddies were doing exactly the same thing. And if I dated her, my Fraternity Brothers would relentlessly be after her. There is no honor among thieves or young men in heat.

I would always look for a representative of the next tier down on the 1-10 scale. Thereby, paying attention to a 7.0 or a 7.5. girl. She was usually attractive, but just not a Bo Derek. Always fun, and just as bright as the 9.5. leader. And maybe a bit less full of herself. The clincher: she was super appreciative that I enthusiastically paid a lot of attention to her and asked for her phone number. The usual pattern was having her 9.5 buddy swarmed by all the other guys, while she was ignored.

My high school girlfriend was a 7.0. My college girlfriend? 7.5. So, you ask, how about me? Was I a 10.0., so self righteous and a guy that attracted all the women? Not even close. If I were to be honest, I was like a 7.0, so in a way, I was staying in my own lane. Even at that age, I was aware of my character strengths and I played those tunes. I knew instinctively to talk 20% of the time and listen 80%. My 7.0 - 8.0 buddies still chased the 9.5 ladies, with little success.

Beautiful, rich people tend to marry other beautiful, rich people. Smart people usually end up with other smart people. Nature has a way of sorting these things out.

I have been with my imperfect wife for 52 years and she has tolerated her fallible husband for the same. Superficial looks fade over time. Our love has remained a solid 10.0, for as long as I can remember. At 77, when I look at her, I see her essence and the same image of who she was at 25.

Bob P.

Photo by Tamara Bellis on Unsplash